Oh Geppetto, I Just Want to be a Real Boy...er...Girl...
So it’s official. I am not normal. I realize that most of you regular readers are well aware of this fact after much self disclosure on my part over the last year, but now I am aware of my abnormal-ness on a whole new level. Here it is…I’m not a normal girl. This new level of self discovery was made possible though a little pre-Valentine’s day discussion between me and my dear hubby. I thought I would let you in on the encounter…
Hubby: (approaching gingerly with a mixed look of sweetness, sheepishness and quite possibly like he is up to something) "So Sweetheart…there is a hockey game on Wednesday night, and Dave would really like to go. But it’s Valentines, and if you want me to stay home I will."
Me: "Hmmmm." (in deep thought)
Hubby: "You know what…never mind…I’m going to stay home. Its Valentines…We should really do something together. Unless you don’t mind."
Me: "Hmmmm." (more deep thought…waiting for the feelings of outrage and hurt and womanly indignation over being brushed off on this day of romance and love)
Hubby: "I should really stay home. Do you want me to stay home? What are you thinking?"
Me: "Hmmmm." (more deep thought, and purposeful recall of single days long ago when the thought of a romantic date or rather lack thereof was enough to send me to the Wal-Mart chocolate aisle in a crazed attempt for comfort)
Hubby: "It’s totally up to you. If you don’t want me to go, I will stay home. I WANT to stay home with you. But if you don’t care either way…"
Me: "Hmmmmm...Y'know…Why does this not bother me? I am more bothered about the fact that this doesn’t bother me, than anything. I am not a normal girl!! I should be all hurt and outraged and filled with girl-like consternation. Why does this not bother me? " (panicked self-discovery moment)
You know, I should have known. I should know myself by now. After last year, I should have been prepared. But I wasn’t. And so now, on Valentines Day, Hubby is going out for supper with some church guys, and then to a hockey game, and I am staying home. And we are both happy. Confused, but happy.
P.S. Harv brought me a huge bouquet of beautiful flowers. The warm fuzzy feeling that gurgled in my heart made me feel a little more girly. I am canceling my prescription for hormone therapy pills in the morning.
8 comments:
It's called not being a girl any more and being a real woman........a mature woman. I congratulate you.
Whats it called when even if a guy wants to, you refuse to participate in v-day?
Maybe it's called insensitive to the guy, BUT maybe it's called scared or called emotional pain that gets triggered at that time of year? It seems it should be a person's right not to participate if she is uncomfortable with it for some reason. It's a difficult time for lots of women for lots of reasons.
I don't think it's that I REFUSE to participate. It's more that the particular day is not that big of a deal to me. I would like to be celebrated and romanced every day of the year, not just on one day. Here I thought that I was not very demanding. Maybe I am MORE demanding than most. :)
By the way...Harv is taking me out on Saturday night. So - we are celebrating - just not on the day. He gets to go to the hockey game, and I get taken on a date. Everyone wins.
WELL, THAT'S NOT EXACTLY WHAT I MEANT SUE. I THINK V-DAY IS LAME. I'M NOT ROMANTIC. I THINK A BUNCH OF PEOPLE DOING NICE THINGS JUST BECAUSE EVERYONE ELSE DID IS SILLY.
I THINK THAT IF PEOPLE HAVE A DIFFICULT AND EMOTIONAL TIME OVER A DAY LIKE THIS THE WOMAN SHOULD BE WORKING ON HER SELF ESTEEM.
Thanks Anonymous for clarifying what you meant. Cool. My husband feels exactly the same way you do. I used to feel strongly the same way but now I am pretty ambivalent. It's called old age. It still isn't a day that I celebrate because it seems so manufactured by the card companies....on the other hand the card company employees need to make a living too. Well, 'nuff said by me on this topic.
Just discovered your blog and have been reading through your posts. Love this one!
I guess if you're not normal, then I'm REALLY out there. My husband and I got engaged on Valentine's so that should make it more special, right? But for about the first 8 years we were married he went away on a boy's ski trip over Presidents weekend and was almost always gone on Valentines... and I really could not have cared less. I love my hubby! But it was all good. These days are different... we usually go on a "family date" to celebrate V-day and we have lots of fun.
Rachelle...glad to see I'm not the only one out there! I'm also glad you found your way to my blog. Feel free to pop in anytime!
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