The Sweet Taste of Friendship

Tonight we are going out for dessert with a couple that has just started coming to our church. And though I always really enjoy getting to know the new people that come (and lets face it, I love dessert) part of me wishes that I was able to fast forward this evening. I wish that I could fast forward friendship. I would like to skip ahead down the road a year or so from now to a place of comfortableness. To a place where you know all the answers to those first shy “getting to know you” questions. I wish that we could already be in a place where we are at ease, and where you can spend time just chatting, or even pruning trees together (thank you Becky) and all is good, and there is no nervousness. No hesitation. If I think about my close friends, I can hardly remember a time where we didn’t know each other, and where we muddled through the first moments of awkwardness and potential conversation gaps. With so many it just seems like it has always been - like we've known each other all our lives.

I guess all relationships have to start in this place, and even my dearest friend Tia and I laugh about the silly thing she said to me when we first met. Every friendship has to start at the beginning, but if I was honest, I wish they wouldn’t. I wish we could skip this part. I wish all friends were “old friends”. I know I am not the only one that feels this way. But I also know there are those that feel differently. My dad loves meeting new people, and making connections. There are those that enjoy the thrill of newness in a friendship. But it just makes me nervous. I am great with first impressions. I can be charming like the best of them when we first meet. It is the first coffee’s that I have trouble with. The first conversations that last more than 5 minutes where I wonder what to say, and wonder if they will like me, or think I am not as charming as my first impression hinted at.

There is something so great about knowing each other. There is such a feeling of peace that comes from being known, and being accepted. To be able to so freely be yourself and enjoy who you are being. I wish that I could be that way even with strangers.

But I will go tonight. And it will be great. And the dessert will be awesome. And I will try not to be nervous, or feel like I have to fill in every single conversation gap. Because if there is one thing I have learned from years of having friends, is that it is all worth it. Because so often, the first awkward coffee date can give way to closer friendship down the road. The beginnings of tentative conversation can lead to deeper talks that make all this effort worth the while. And so many of you who have blessed me with your friendship, have shown me that when we push through, it is SO worth it in the end.